Tuesday, September 22, 2009


Hello all. I'm Victor Martinez, star catcher for the Boston Red Sox and proud owner of the Vmart chain of discount department stores. Vmart is proud to offer you a wide-range of wonderful products. Among the many things you'll see at our stores...

- We sell only things that begin with the letter 'V', like: vans, vegetables, and vacuums
- Instead of TVs, we sell VVs. Same thing, twice the 'V'.
- Mondays are our 'blue light' specials. Everything costs 55 cents (5=roman numeral V)
- At our in-house butcher shop, you'll find nothing but delicious venison.
- We've got a travel agency, where you can book vacations to Venezuela (my homeland).
-We've got used Volkswagens and Volvos that go "Vvvvvvvrooom".
- Check out our wonderful mattress section and catch up on a few 'Vvv's'
-You like Elvis? We've got 'Viva Las Vegas' playing on a loop.
- All our employees wear V-necks, including Frank Viola.
- We've got valet parking!

If you need me, I'll be in the 'Horrible Jokes' department.

Respectfully Yours,

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi, my name is Stuttering Sam. If I go to Vmart can I purchase a vvvacuum? GO SOX!!