Tuesday, February 16, 2010

I'm sorry everyone except America

I, and the other multiple millions that have evolved into a more primitive form of human than the following, would like to apologize on behalf of the oaf-like screaming jerkasses at The Olympics that feel the need to always chant "U-S-A, U-S-A!" every time an American sets foot on the ice/field/snow/death luge. While I have what I feel is sufficient pride in my country and the athletes that represent us, I f*cking hate that chant. It sounds, and sometimes looks, like a cage full of apes (not monkeys mind you) were let go near the stadium/mountain/death luge, given some chest paint and taught to yell out 3 simple letters over and over while giving menacing looks to any competitor that isn't wearing the Stars and Stripes.

Now I'm not really a fan of soccer, or football as everyone else in the world would call it, but the signing and dancing and creativeness that goes into those Euro/South American chants are amazing and they bring a lot of those to the Olympics with them. I wish the chest painters would use those college degrees they will be paying off for the next 30 years to come up with something a little more original. (Side note: a small taste of US Soccer Fans)

To relate this to baseball, sometimes at Sox games I find it hard to believe the same people that brought you the classic "Where-is-Rog-er.... In-the-show-er" (BRILLIANT by the way) are able to sink down to such a low level so quickly when "Yankees Suck" breaks out every 3rd inning. If there's one thing worse than "U-S-A" it's definitely "Yankees Suck", and I hate me some Yankees, believe you me. I just hate the mind numbingness of the chant even more.

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