I need action

The last few days were great but what the hell happened yesterday? No rumors, no more Sloth on a stage mumbling something through those busted chicklets he calls teeth, no Jessica Biel movies on tv ALL day? It's like the freezing cold has reached its' nipply hardening cold self into all the other good aspects of life and freezed them to death. There's gotta be some low tier free agent that can get us through the weekend? Some organizational depth? A fatter version of Dustin Pedroia that we can pass off as Chunk so he can follow Lackey around all day doing the truffle shuffle? Please Red Sox, for the sake of my boredom, do something else. What was that? You're in talks with Prince Fielder? Oh, do go on...

One Hundred BILLION dollars!!!

That's how much the MLB Network and MLB.com must have paid Peter Gammons for leaving ESPN to now sit beside Mitch Williams, Matt Varschuersomething and ex-ESPN-er Harold Reynolds. Gammons, who was best known for making ESPN tolerable through what I refer to as the "Stuart Scott era", leaves an absolute wake of awesomeness behind him as he instantly makes MLB network analysis something not to miss. As a Sox fan, and Gammons as a lifer around these parts, I've felt that Gammy (What Tito calls him) always wanted to blurt out some anti-Yankee sentiment in the middle of some of his trade rumors.

"Word has it, Stuart, that The Yankees are going to go after CC Sabathia, Mark Teixera AND AJ Burnett... did I read that right? Do these asshats have no shame? Great, that leaves what, table scraps for the rest of the league. F#*kin' Yankees. Back to you Stuart, you lazy eyed motha f#&ker."

So now Gammons continues his analytical dominance at a channel which really was made especially for him. 100% baseball all the time. Hell, even the field they have in the studio looks like somethings Gammy could have ran around on in his hay-day.

**EDIT** Hold the effin' phones. My apologies for the first part of this post that I wrote last night, but now they're saying Petey boy is also going to be working for NESN in 2010? So what you're telling me is we get DO, Remy, Watney, Rice, The Eck AND Gammy?!?! This is like a movie about Micheal J Fox driving a time machine into Rocky's fight with the Russian while Arnold is just about to give the thumbs up to Jessica Biel (clothes optional) as he's dipped into a tub of "magma" and Peter Gammons is doing play by play on the entire thing. Wow. Just wow. See you around Gammy.

Panic Button Pushed

I know all about 2004. I know nothing is over til it's over but it sure as hell doesn't make the downswing any easier. I like that today is an off day because 1 run over the last 18 innings means the boys need some refreshing. They're probably home by now with their respective wives/hired escorts/Jessica Biel clones and relaxing this morning just trying to get their bearings back. Me, I'm taking the baseball day off. No sports radio, no ESPN, no NESN. (I'll just google Heidi Watney if I miss NESN.) I suggest we all do the same. Definitely on the Googling front. During the games the Sox need our concentrated efforts to root them on, but they also need to know we are all properly relaxing and taking time away from the game so we, the fans, can be refreshed for tomorrows plain up stupid 12:07 start time. Selig rant... rising... must... hold... off. Damn you Bud!!!

Old Man River

That right there in fact is an x-ray of Mike Lowell's hip*. As you can see, it hurts. My theory on how the pain made its comeback is that with Lester just being on such a tear, kicking things in the nuts left and right, Mr. Lowell was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time, dislodging all nuts and hips in the process. Between Lester toying with the O's hitters and Drew nearly going for the cycle, last night was a good ol beat down that the boys needed. Sure it was only 4-0, but the game always seemed about as close as I am to getting that date with Jessica Biel.

Also, check out this little blog do-hickey by Terence Moore about how the false notion that is Red Sox Nation will soon be coming to an end. Who is Terence Moore you ask? Well, according to his ending credits, "He is a frequent panelist on "Rome Is Burning"..." So judging from his previous working experience, he's a hack.

*That in fact is not an x-ray of Mike Lowell's hip. It may not even be a hip. I'm not a doctor so I can't confirm what it is